Movies

The leading theory behind why this is happening is sheer racism. Hollywood believes that American audiences do not like all-Asian casts. If such is the case, why have movies like “Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon”, “House of Flying Daggers”, “Hero”, and “Memoirs of a Geisha” done so well in the box office. However, this is a thinly veiled excuse. Hollywood is just incapable of saying they have no new ideas, so they have to pull them from other countries, hoping that they can draw audiences in that are ignorant of the original movies. Usually,80% (Based on my research) of all the remakes made over the last few years, The original Japanese films were better than the million dollar budget American films.

For example, “The Eye” with Jessica Alba which came out recently is an Americanization of the original. At best, it is just going to be shot in an American style with effects that American audiences are “used to.” After seeing the preview, and having seen the original, the similarities are too close to even bother with going to see such a blatant rehash. Likewise “One Missed Call” which gives credit to its Japanese forbearer appears to be a word for word redubbing with a white cast.

All in all, this trend, along with remaking movies that have done well before and turning every wildly popular book into a movie. Reasons like these are why people are not going to movies anymore. Well, that and extortive ticket prices.

Why go see these films when you can rent the Japanese originals on Netflix?

When news came out that a fourth Indiana Jones movie was finally being made, a lot of fans felt a small amount of fear. Would George Lucas destroy yet another trilogy that had made him so famous? Would Lucas be writing the script? While the script is nowhere near as bad as the prequel Star Wars movies, Lucas has yet again created another movie that does not live up to the original trilogy. Once more, he has come back to something that was fine where it was.

First of all, the enthusiasm of Harrison Ford can not be ignored. He has kept fit and eagerly awaited a chance to play Indiana Jones again, possibly Ford’s favorite character to play in a film. Many wondered if Ford would still be agile and strong enough to perform and do his own stunts. He was indeed. While age is definitely starting to show on Harrison Ford and Indy moves a lot slower then we remembered, he still manages to pull off his own stunts and bring experience into the role.

The plot revolves around Indiana Jones attempting to beat the Russians to El Dorado (the Lost City of Gold). Complicating things are a greaser sidekick (his name gives away his and Indy’s connection if you remember Last Crusade, see after the review if you really want to know) named Mutt Williams (Shia LaBeouf) , the return of Marion Ravenwood (Karen Allen) and a strange crystal skull that looks inhuman.

Now, the basic problem with the movie itself is…the plot. Things are all over the place. While we have some of the old Indy charm and humor, we have a movie that mostly consists of one long 20 minute car chase and Indiana being captured every 5 seconds. George Lucas’ writing doesn’t help, as he practically beats us over the head just in case we don’t get the ‘surprise’ ending (since it's mentioned every few seconds, it's not too surprising when the ending comes up…it just becomes a slow torturous wait as you pray that you are wrong).

A lot of the sub plots are sort of glossed over, Indy just doesn’t seem to put up much of a fight against the Russians and we are introduced to yet another new character (Mac played by Ray Winstone) who, for some reason, we are suppose to care about and yet don’t, as we only see one side of a two dimensional character throughout the entire film. We also run into a lot of elements that were very obviously thrown in just to try and fulfill the entire Indiana Jones needs. A snake, random savages and one or two booby traps are just tossed in with very little thought or even set up.

Compared to the other three Indy movies, this one is a mess. While Indy has always been known for daring acrobatics, thrilling chases and brushes with the supernatural, this entire movie will leave you staring up at the screen with a ‘what the hell?!’ expression frozen on your face. Without spoiling the ending, it is so outside the realm of Indy, that you almost feel your watching a whole nother movie.

Overall, I can not recommend this movie. It is, without a doubt, the weakest and worst of the Jones trilogy (I happened to really like Temple of Doom). The ending feels horribly tacked on, the plot is shoddy, the story is mostly two really big chases and no where as clear and concise as the other three films. I didn’t feel that I was watching an Indiana Jones movie at all and I was not as immersed into Jones’ world like I was in the other three movies. If you really must see this to complete your watching of all the Indiana Jones movies then I recommend you save your ten bucks and wait for this to come out on Netflixes.

SPOILER

YOU’VE BEEN WARNED!

SPOILER

If you are unsure as to who Mutt is and why he is named Mutt, I present a quote from the end of The Last Crusade.

Sallah: Please, what does it mean, this…this “Junior”?
Professor Henry Jones: That’s his name. [points to self] Henry Jones…[points at Indy] Junior.
Indy: I like “Indiana”.
Professor Henry Jones: We named the *dog* Indiana.
Sallah: The dog? Your named after the dog?

"Any sufficiently advanced technology is indistinguishable from magic." Clarke's Third Law.

Sharing an interesting discussion about Iron Man 2 with some friends at some boards, I ended up realizing that I don't think the Mandarin would be a good choice as the villain for the third movie starring the Golden Avenger.

The Mandarin is an excellent idea for a behind the scenes, shadowy master, in fact, I thought it weird that the second movie didn't make any reference to him (while they did in the first one)... but as a villain in a medium other than comics, for a hero with a sci-fi flavor like Iron Man, he'll look ridiculous. Iron Man looks better when he faces technological-based enemies... and while the Mandarin uses alien technology, it looks like magic.

A friend of mine says the Mandarin is "widely clamored" for as a villain for the third movie. Truth be told, I participate in a lot of boards and other digital environments where there are lots of people who enjoy these movies. Not just comic book fans specifically, but people generally interested in this kind of fiction. However, I haven't seen anyone demand the Mandarin is next movie's villain... obviously some people have, but I haven't seen it.

In fact, I haven't even seen people other than my friend comment on other people asking for the Mandarin. This is why I think that the amount of people in the web asking for him is not really big. And if it's not big within that "vocal minority", it's even smaller amongst the general public. Even if I don't want him in the next movie, nor do the people I regularly talk to, it seems strange that I wouldn't even hear a rumor about it other than from my friend. I mean, like I said before, I frequent a lot of boards and other outlets, and I spend over twelve hours on the computer.

Concerning the Mandarin as a feasible or desirable villain for an Iron Man movie, I strongly believe that he's not a good choice at all. Like all Iron Man villains, he's a virtual unknown... Iron Man himself was pretty much a non-entity for the public at large until the first movie, his mainstream popularity was never close to that of Spider-Man or Hulk, to mention other Marvel characters. Some people remember the nineties Iron Man cartoon, yes, that's true, but... how many remember that the Mandarin's powers weren't magical? If you remember, it's probably due to one or both of these reasons: 1) You like Iron Man and you paid special attention to his show. 2) You're very fond of animation, and pay special attention to any animated series you watch.

I can assure you that even the most stalwart comic book reader (except for Iron Man fans specifically) like me have to think a little to remember that the Mandarin uses alien tech. And if people like me (for all my flaws as a person, I know a lot about superhero comics) have to think... imagine the 99.9% of the public that goes to see an Iron Man film. Only a 5% of that people saw his cartoon, and you'll be lucky if a tenth of that 5% remembers that the Mandarin's powers were technological in nature.

In fact, now that I check, the Mandarin in the animated series only has the name and the alien rings in common with the comic book one. Besides that, he's different person, with ill-defined powers assigned to the rings, and with very different origins and motivations. You can say that all of this is about the comics, and not about the movies, and that the Mandarin is still a good villain for a movie. And I say that, precisely because these are movies, is that the Mandarin is not a good villain.

The central themes in Iron Man are man and machine, good and evil use of technology, the triumph of the inventor/benevolent industrialist over the industrialist/businessman that makes weapons of war. And what is the physical, tangible object of these themes? The machine. Not technology, because technology in itself is too unspecific a term, technology is anything from a tank, to a ballpoint pen, to alien energy manipulating rings.

No, the central point to all this is THE MACHINE. The machine as a tangible and solid application of technology, the machine as an object clearly present in people's live, that changes their existence, for good or for ill. And the Mandarin doesn't have machines, the Mandarin wears bijou that shoots rays. Party favors that disintegrate people.

What the hell does all this have to do with the medium being comics or movies? That, excepting nerds (and we are a small percentage), most people watching a Hollywood film needs things explained clearly, spelled out. At most, they'll use three or five minutes to explain that the Mandarin uses alien tech, and for the other two hours of film, you'll see a Chinese guy with rings that shoot rays. (If you're lucky, because if they go the animated series way, you'll have a green-skinned US citizen with pointy ears.)

Mentioning in passing that the rings are alien technology will not be enough to avoid that a very high percentage of moviegoers (including non-specialized film critics) will exit the theater complaining that the third Iron Man movie was crap because Iron Man fought some Asian guy with magic rings he got from dragons. Oh, yes, because the aliens whose technology the Mandarin's rings are based on, the Makluan, are giant dragons... if they even show that briefly in the film, it'll make it even worse.

There's just not enough time to conceptually justify something as technological when, visually, it's a guy with magic rings. And even if you used half an hour of screen time to explain this, or you reminded it in expository dialogue every fifteen minutes, it'd be useless. People in general don't pay attention to this kind of stuff, and they'll leave the cinema saying that Iron Man fought a guy with magic rings... just like in Lord of the Rings!!!

Think I'm exaggerating? Well, I've heard lot of people say that "they like Iron Man because they love robots", when Tony Stark shows his face every fifteen minutes in the movie, removes his helmet, takes of the armor and puts it back on again. People see a humanoid metal figure and think "robot". People see a guy with rings that shoot energy and think "magic". Even surrounded by aliens and spaceships, and not being a Chinese man in ancient armor, it's possible that not even Green Lantern might avoid being branded as a guy with a magic ring when his movie opens next year. It's the same people that think Star Wars is "in the future" and "on Earth", when each of the six films starts with the phrase "A long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away..." Even a high number of self-proclaimed nerds think Star Wars is in the future (which is not the same as being futuristic).

And if Jon Favreau, director of the Iron Man saga, wanted to use the Mandarin as Tony's archenemy, he fucked up. Why? Because in the first movie he named Tony's captors "The Ten Rings", and every nerd said "Oh, he's preparing the sequel". Was the Mandarin in the sequel? No, not even a small reference, not even a mention of the terrorist group that kidnapped Tony in the first film.

He fucked up, because if the Mandarin shows up in the third movie, even if they spend ten minutes explaining he was the leader of the terrorists, he'll still be a Chinese guy with ray-shooting rings, and people will be wondering what does this guy with magical jewelry has to do with the red and yellow robot good guy of the film.

Now, if the Mandarin ends up being the villain in the next Iron Man movie, don't come to me. I said I don't think he's the best choice. A vodka tonic, please... put it in Mr. Stark's tab.

MaGnUs

James Cameron has finally returned to his roots of sci-fi. After years of for doing undersea documentaries like "Expedition: Bismarck“, “Ghosts of the Abyss“, and “Aliens of the Deep“, Cameron is finally doing fun movies again. His next project entitled “Avatar“, which was under the working title of Project 880, is an a action thriller set to be released in 2009.

Current Plot: A world filled with incredible life forms, both beautiful and deadly. Among them are those that can breath ammonia gas. Pandora also contains treasures and In the distant future, the planet 'Alpha Centauri B-4' is discovered, and the scientists and astronauts who arrive on this new world call it 'Pandora'. It is resources beyond one’s imagination. However, this world is dangerous to those who would use it for their own gain. It may kill not only it’s new inhabitants, but their home as well.

Avatar Teaser Poster

Avatar is the story of a wounded ex-marine. Jake Sully, a paraplegic war veteran, is thrust unwillingly into an effort to exploit an new planet, rich in resources and plant life. Sully eventually crosses over to lead the the Na'vi in a battle for survival. The Na’vi are the indigenous, humanoid race which posess their own language and culture.

Sounds pretty interesting to me, even though it’s a well used storyline: “Explorers of a new world, coming to rape and ravage a pristine land.” It’s the founding of the American colonies in space. With all that aside, it will be good to see another battle with humans and some sort of aliens in space. Even though Cameron is writing it himself, I just hope it doesn't turn into popcorn shoot-em up movie. After many years off, can Cameron still write a compelling story arc like he did with the first two Terminators? How about the Abyss, Aliens, and (even though I can't stand the movie but it was very well written) Titanic. He has always, in the past, given us characters people come to admire and love.

Avatar Teaser Poster

Can the cast pull off strong character performances or are they just going to be running around shooting everything in sight and giving off bad one liners? At this moment, the cast is being lead by Sam Worthington, playing Jake Sully. Neytiri is played by Zoe Saldana (who is going to be playing Uhura in the next Star Trek movie), Selfridge is played by Giovanni Ribisi, Trudy Chacon is played by Michelle Rodriguez, and Grace is played by Sigourney Weaver (Sigourney Weaver + Aliens + Cameron = a great time for all). Cameron thought about Michael Biehn for the role of Col. Quaritch (now being played by Stephen Lang) but he didn't want people thinking it is going to be a remake of Aliens, as Weaver had already been cast.

With that all being said, I am looking forward to this movie. Cameron did not have to come back and direct anything, he is set for life. He is now in a position to go to any studio he wants and make the films he wants. He also knows how to push the actors to give great performances. All in all, I hope this will be a great film. Now, I'm going to sit back and watch some more flicks with my girl. Stay tuned for more previews.

Reaper Virus + Scotland = Total Anarchy

Doomsday is based on the ever expanding genre of "Viral Outbreak Apocalypse". Fortunately, you don't turn into zombies in this movie! Just Mad Max looking cannibals.

Starring mostly unknowns, this movie actually does a great job on delivery. As stated, the plot is quite overdone, but this adds a new twist. With no zombies running amok, it makes this movie into more of a sci-fi action, than a horror film.

The visual scenes are quite attractive, especially when you go from the contrasts of future London, Post-Apocalyptic Scotland and the Dark Ages. No, no, no, there's no time traveling, but when you become completely secluded from the rest of the world by a giant fucking wall, you tend to make do with what you have accessable, and let's face it, Scotland's got some kickass castles.

The true plot to the movie is that there is a virus outbreak in Scotland that destroys the entire country and it's people. To keep this deadly virus from spreading to the entire world, a giant wall is erected, separating Scotland from England, and blocking all attempts to escape by water.

20+ years later, this virus appears in England. In an attempt to keep a reign on things, the UK has been spying on Scotland and known for a couple of years that there are survivors, which means, THERE MUST BE A CURE!

Several top trained military agents are sent into Scotland "over the wall" to find this cure, and finally stop the Reaper Virus, only to find leather and metal clad cannabals who have no other function than to destroy and eat anyone that they don't like.

The team, of course, is on a time limit though. They have only 46 hours to find and return with an anti-virus, or all of central London will be flooded in an attempt to skirt the impending doom of viral apocalypse.

There were a few plot holes in this movie, and it did seem quite thrown together more for visual and gore appeal, than actual plot. None the less, it is quite an entertaining movie. I'm glad I rented it, instead of going to the theater.

I give this movie a 7/10

Plot: 6/10 for originality

Visual Appeal: 9/10 for wonderful use of contrasts and environment without overdoing it

Replayability: 7/10 just to catch stuff you might have missed once

From director/writer/producer/editor/etc/etc John Johnson, this is quite an entertaining film, that was made for under 5000 bucks, released by brain damage in 2008, this film centers around a group of con artists, who con people out of money to help them with "supernatural cleansings." However upon recieving a package of money, they come to the cemetary to retrive the Artifact of Power which releases 7 demons from another dimension, of which they now have to battle in order to save the world, and their souls.

Full of references to films such as Ghostbusters, and dialogue that would confuse the fuck out of Christopher Walken, this film is amazing to percieve with as little budget that it has, even though you can definitely tell that its low budget. Now, if you do not enjoy watching films that are of this caliber, then by all means, pick up that copy of 2004's Dawn of the Dead. But if you want to watch a group of con men fight against a 7 person army of demons, one of which, they have to remove his liver to kill him, then you shall enjoy this little jewel.

This film has it all, horror, comedy, kungfu fighting, gun fights, 3 ways, soul sucking succubi, riddling jesters, and a beautiful princess, whom is trying to survive, then you shall enjoy this film of epic confusion!

8 out of 10 Snapping Zombie Heads

Forgetting Sarah Marshall

Definitely my favorite comedy of the year, FSM is a hysterical look at one man's broken heart when he finds out his girlfriend of 5 and a half years breaks up with him. Distraught over this, he goes to Hawaii to get over her so to speak, and runs into her and her new beau. Enter hysterical foolishness. Filled with great songs from the writer of this movie, of which he also stars in! Full of hijinks from a man who had his heart shattered into a million pieces and now his cock doesn’t want to be around Sarah Marshall anymore, why? Because she’s the goddamn devil!

If you enjoy films such as 40 Year old Virgin, A Fish Called Wanda, or anything of that nature, give this one a try, you may like it, you may hate it, but you wont forget it. I highly recommend this to anyone who has ever had relationship issues.

9 out of 10 Snapping Zombie Heads

Friday the 13th - 2009 - The Yarg's Movie Reviews

I saw this film opening day, and I must say was well worth the wait. This isn't the average Jason film such as 2 through 11 were. (Yes im including Freddy VS. Jason in the list.) In this film, Jason is much scarier than he was in the other 9 that he stars in. Yes, 2 of the films did not have Jason Vorhees. What a shocker! (lol.) Jason is intelligent, fast, works out things quite well, and is much more methodical in his killings than in his previous films, where he just seemed to go on a rampage once awoken. In this film, he does some stuff that he hadnt done to his victims in previous films. I'll leave you a hint (sleeping bag) which was quite new, and invigorating.

The film takes place in modern day, unlike the previous films where Jason's timeline is a bit shakier. He was just a small boy when his mother was killed, unlike the others when he is an adult when his mother is killed. Full of great "shock" moments, which I actually enjoyed. Lots of gore, the usual boob factor you find in any Friday the 13th series, and a different approach to the previous chapters in the series. It takes off from Friday the 13th part 1, and goes on a completley different path. (Ignore 2 through 11 when you watch t.) Finally! A remake/retelling that is worthy of the stamp of approval that I have had a difficult time in using since 1990's remake of Night of the Living Dead.

I award the Friday the 13th (2009)

9 out of 10 Snapping Zombie Heads

THEM!

OK, these movies are several years old, but I will make this a point in every updated movie review post, to add a unknown zombie film I have seen... to bring it to the eyes of people everywhere

These movies, are low budget at its finest, and by low budget I do not mean a million dollars, or one hundred thousand dollars, I am talking less than ten thousand dollars. These films are extremely cheesy, full of unneeded nudity at times, and have storylines that make little to no sense, yet after all of that, they are fun to watch, for any zombie fan... Centers around 2 government agents, who unbeknownst to them, helped the zombie epidemic happen. Joining them are 3 Vampire women with laser blasters, yes, laser blasters, like in Star Wars. And a Mexican wrestler, who while fighting with the dead, wrestles them into submission. Going throughout the city, they try to survive the apocalypse, looking for supplies and survivors... coming to a somewhat minute epic battle at the end...

The second Meat Market, takes place about a year after the first, of which Argenta, the sole surviving agent, along with Nemesis the sole surviving Vampire, and a few others go on from city to city looking for survivors, of which they are finding fewer and fewer. Coming upon a survivor who leads them to a facility full of survivors, they are disarmed by the new "police force" and divided up, this new world, is run by a former motivational speaker named Bill, of which sanity has left a long time ago...

Full of blood, guts, cannibalism, guns, lasers, vampires, wrestlers, explosions, fire, and enough insanity to shake a stick at, if you have a boring Saturday night planned, I recommend picking up these films, whether you love them or hate them at the end... you will have laughed your ass off, either in disgust, or in stupidity...

7 out of 10 Snapping Zombie Heads

Poultrygeist - Night of the Chicken Dead

Troma’s latest feature, Poultrygeist, follows the lives of two young lovers, whom separated by college, to be reunited, at the grand opening of a new fast food restaurant, one that happens to be built on top of the Ancient Tromahawk Indians burial ground, unleashing a massive curse on all those who ingest the chicken.

A real Troma film in every way, this one seems to love its asses, whether its guy or girl, and things coming in and out of them. On top of all this gore, it is a musical! Yes, you heard me correctly, there is a lot of singing in this film, with future classic hits such as, Revenge is a Dish Best Served Fried, and Generous General!

This film will be fun for all generations of sick twisted, perverted individuals the world over. Troma films are well known for having very punk rock soundtracks, and this one is no different, with fun tracks like Milk, Milk, Lemonade by Dingleberry Dynasty, and Green Eggs and Pam by Purple Pam. Very fun movie all around in my opinion. Wait until you find how you are supposed to destroy the chicken dead. It's so simple, a Native American could do it!

Poultrygeist: Night of the Chicken Dead gets 7 out of 10 Snapping Zombie Heads

Punisher: War Zone via IGN.com

What can I say about this new look into the world of the Punisher? Hmmm… well I will admit first and foremost, I have never picked up the comics myself, most will say that’s horrible, others will say who cares. Anyways, I saw this film opening night with a female friend of mine, also, a nonreader of the series. From start to finish, this film is violent, bloody, shoot them up, don’t ask questions til after its all done, insanity, free runners, surface to air missles, and multiple broken body parts. This Punisher film, does not follow the Thomas Jane’s 2004 Punisher storyline, from what I gather, its closer to the comics storyline. It starts up 5 years into the Punishers vendetta against the corrupt and unjust, with him in the swing of things. Where he comes across his new targets, Jigsaw, and his brother Loony Bin Jim, aka James. They vow to take revenge on Castle for what he did to Jigsaw, and are itching to take him out, cue violent death scenes…

The ONLY problem I have with this film, is that Frank Castle is SUPERHUMAN strong, there are a few people that he punches in the face, but his fist all but goes through their HEAD! I’m not talking like with a weapon, but just his fist, goes through one guys face, like it was made of jello. Other than that, it was a superb action packed film, filled with madness and mayhem.

This film is a X rating compared to 2004’s The Punisher, but probably still considered PG compared to the comics. Let’s just say, that at the theatre I saw it at, they made it unofficially NC-17, and did not let ANY kids in to see it.

Punisher: War Zone gets 8 out of 10 Snapping Zombie Heads

Paris Hilton is Amber Sweet in Repo: The Genetic Opera

Repo the Genetic Opera dvd Review from The Yarg

I watched this film the other night after picking it up from the store. I was waiting for it for over a year, and it did not disappoint me one bit. Full of great music, wonderful lyrics, a kick ass soundtrack in itself, acting that was out of this world, and lets not forget the gore factor, lordy no! Starring Alexa Vega, yes, the little girl from the Spy Kids films, whom i did not know had such a lovely singing voice... Anthony Stewert Head, who is most famous for his role on the Buffy The Vampire Slayer Series as Giles, Paul Sorvino, Bill Mosley, and not a bad performance by Paris Hilton, and for those who know me, I dont much care for the PH.
Taking place in a world, where out of the blue, organ failures hit across the world, killing millions and millions of people, after a few years of this taking place, a company emerges out of the dust, a hero? On the horizon, GENECO! will give you new organs for a price. Just make your payment, and there wont be a problem. After a few years of this, congress legalizes reposessions! Which means, that if you miss a payment, they send in THE REPO MAN! to repossess your organs, killing you in the process... This rock opera, which means that there is no talking, only singing throughout... was for me, a nice refreshing wake up in the land of "musicals" there hasnt been such a great musical in my eyes since TOMMY originally written by The Who.

The films, which centers around Alexa Vega's character, Shilo, whom is stricken by a blood disease, to which keeps her inside, away from the cruel world outside, her overbearing, and protective father, played by Anthony S. Head, tries to shield her from the world outside. full of rebellion against her father, she decides to go out in the world, discovering the new age drug, the ever so popular, elective organ transplants, she uncovers a deadly secret about her father, and of the company GENECO...

I give this film my stamp of approval for all gorehounds out there...

10 out of 10 Snapping Zombie Heads...

Star Trek (2009)

First off, let me get this out in the open, i am not a Star Trek fan. That being said, i found this film entertaining as hell. This takes on a different storyline, and universe so to speak, than the Star Trek with Captain James T Kirk, that everyone has known before, due to a blackhole, a group of Romulans come back in time, to seek revenge on those who failed to save their planet from destruction which happens in the future. Confused yet? Anyways, upon entering the past, they destroy the USS Kelvin, of which Kirks father was on, trying to save the crew by launching himself against the Romulans.

Jump ahead to the future, James Kirk has become a rebel, and has not joined star fleet. Talked into it by a friend of his fathers, he joins the fleet, where his first nemesis, albeit it only for a short while, Spock, enters his life, causing him nothing but trouble. After a crisis hits, which has all of the last year star fleet cadets jump aboard their respective ships, you get to see the crew of the Enterprise togethor, for the first time we get to see them working togethor, fighting against this evil doer, Nero, played by Eric Bana, this film had so many people working on it, it was quite funny, Winona Ryder as Spocks Mum, and in one of the scenes, aboard the Enterprise, you even see Kal Penn playing a extra, i shit you not.

This film is highly entertaining, is a bit more of a action film, then a sci fi film, but it delivers well. i highly recommend it for anyone who enjoys sci fi, action, or star trek... you will not be disappointed...

I give this film, 9 out of 10 snapping zombie heads.

Terminator Salvation

Taking place in the year 2018, John Conner has yet to become the head of the human resistence, he is still moving up the ranks, but he does have his following of people who believe him to be the one to take back the planet and to defeat skynet, once and for all. Heading the West Coast Branch of the Resistence, he comes to find out that Skynet has a hitlist, of which Conner himself is number two on the list, number one belonging to Kyle Reese, his father. So its a race against time to find the boy, who he will send back in time to save his mother... This film has two storylines basically, one of Marcus Wright, a drifter who doesnt know what is going on whatsoever, and stumbling across Kyle Reese himself, yet still a teenager. Togethor, they decide to find the resistence base, and join up with John Conner. Conner, meanwhile, is trying to find his father, and systematically destroy skynet with a new defence weapon.

This film is what the third terminator film should of been, it is full of action, great acting, a amazing storyline, wonderful effects, and is wonderful to see Kyle Reese again, and how he learned so much, from the drifter Marcus Wright.

I give this film, 9 out of 10 snapping zombie heads.

Seeing this film, was for the most part kind of blah. Within 10 minutes, I had already figured out where their buddy was. Then, I had to sit around for another 90 minutes for them to find him. Some sequences were funny as hell, others clearly outdated and overdone.

However, amongst all of this, you have a good set of actors who clearly enjoyed making this film. They worked well together and seeing Heather Graham again, especially topless, was unbelievable. She looks even more beautiful than when last I saw her.

The amount of cameos in this film is overwhelming, however it is taking place in Las Vegas, so I'd let it slide. For a comedy, it was written fine but I needed more comedy and less "3 Stooges" at times. Zach Galifinakis was just amusing as hell to watch, especially when he gets zapped with a tazer, twice. Ed Helms had, by far, the best dialogue and character development out of EVERYONE in the film. Watching him makes me think of certain guys I went to high school with.

If you are looking for you generic amnesiac comedy, you should enjoy it.


6 out of 10 snapping zombie heads

THEM!

Definitely old school film, made in 1954, THEM! was the first horror film to bring up negative effects wrought upon the earth. Taking place in White Sands, New Mexico, the police force are investigating several missing person reports. Of which giant ants are responsible, upon finding the nest, they bomb and gas it, thinking that they have beaten the giant insects, they find out that several newly hatched queens have escaped, and started up nests elsewhere. Going all over the west coast, they finally find the nest in California, of which, the most epic battle between humans and giant ants takes place.

This film, is personally my favorite of the giant monster movies ever created, yes, it was the fifties, the effects are unbelievably fake looking, but I love this film, and for any horror fan that will give a black and white film a chance from that era, I highly recommend watching it...

10 out of 10 Snapping Zombie Heads

Plan 9 From Outer Space

Thats right, im about to review the WORST film ever made according to most everyone out there, and do you know why? because it is definitely one of the most entertaining for people like me, and i always enjoy sending this into the minds of potential new fans.Made in 1959, written and directed by Edward D. Wood Jr, this movie has several things it is known for, it is Bela Lugosi's final role before his death, it has some of the cheesiest effects every made, and in 1994, was made into sort of a biopic movie starring Johnny Depp.

Now onto the movie, taking place in San Fernando valley, California, the residents take notice to several murders taking place in their cemetary, a police officer, 2 grave diggers, and multiple sightings of UFO's, "some of which are described as cigar shaped, even though clearly when you see them, they are disk shaped" Then there are the aliens, who come from a land of silky satiny shiny pajama soldier uniforms, whom have brought the dead back to life to take over the world so to speak, for the living fear the dead.

Even though quite a bit of the dialogue is repetative, and some of the lines clearly fubbed, this movie has won the hearts and minds of countless minions across the whole universe. And even to this day, gains new fans every year, young and old. If you love old timey films, or just want to see something that isnt Michael Bay action packed oriented, give this golden oldie a try, if you dont like it, look at it this way, you can say that you have just witnessed one of the worst films every made!

9  out of 10 Snapping Zombie Heads.